If you\u2019re an introvert, there\u2019s no task more onerous than attending a professional networking mixer. There you are, in a sea of people you don\u2019t know and honestly don\u2019t really want to talk to, and yet you know one of them may be the key to a new job, a new client, or some much-needed advice. At best, it feels like an obstacle course; at worst, it feels like torture.<\/p>\n
At least that’s how I felt. I\u2019m a lifelong introvert who sought out a career in advertising to help counterbalance my unshakeable tendencies toward introversion.
\nThe first hurdle was, of course, breaking into the industry, which is why I started suffering through networking mixers.<\/p>\n
Flash-forward a dozen years: between attending what felt like hundreds of mixers (which eventually paid off) and then working in a notoriously extroverted industry, I\u2019ve picked up some tricks that have made me better at networking \u2013 not just at events, but at work and in my personal life too. Here are a few of the best tips that can help you win almost any social situation.<\/p>\n
We introverts tend to be very process-oriented people. If you can think of a networking event not as a social event but a job-oriented task, you can handle it one step at a time. Examples of different steps could be researching the event, attending the event, giving yourself the goal of meeting x number of people, telling x number of people what you\u2019re looking for, etc. You can also apply this entire \u201cbreak it down into chunks\u201d approach to everything else in your life, including your job search.<\/p>\n
The brutal truth is that many people go to networking events either for the free drinks or they\u2019re there to give their elevator speech and hope you can find them a job. Which is fine, but if you go to a mixer filled with people just like you (e.g., copywriters, new account executives), there may not be very much value to exchange.<\/p>\n
Instead, attend events that are more likely to attract a wider audience. For designers and visual artists, your local AIGA chapter is a great place to look for multifaceted events that attract a range of people. I, personally, have made valuable connections at Creative Mornings, since they attract not only artists, writers and programmers, but also professionals who are eager to learn new ways to solve their business problems.<\/p>\n
Because here is the perfect opening line that works every time: \u201cSo, what brings you to this event?\u201d It\u2019s a bulletproof icebreaker since most people enjoy talking about themselves! It can also help set up a fruitful conversation about what they\u2019re looking to gain from attending the event.<\/p>\n
Your elevator pitch is that brief and meaningful professional summary of who you are, what you can offer, and what you\u2019re looking for. Many career experts recommend a run time of about 30 seconds, but come on! 30 seconds is also the length of the average commercial, and you know what happens when those come on? People get up and leave.<\/p>\n
Have the full 30-second pitch in your back-pocket, but have a trimmed, sound-byte version that can add your elevator pitch to a conversation without monopolizing it. Write it out and practice it, if you must. It really is that important.<\/p>\n
As an introvert, you probably spend a lot of time hanging back, analyzing everyone and everything in the room. Put it to good use! Before you approach anyone, make sure you\u2019re doing it at the right time, with the right person. Look for people who seem pleasant and receptive before you approach them, not distracted (i.e., people that have been on the phone 90% of the time). If you only approach one person at the event, make sure it\u2019s the event organizer. They probably know everyone attending the event, can direct you to key people, and may even introduce you.<\/p>\n
Digital contact cards are nice, but having a real, physical thing that you can jot notes on is best. For one thing, you\u2019re more likely to remember the details of the discussion if you write them by hand. And it gives you the opportunity to write down an interesting fact about the conversation with your new contact, which you can refer to later.<\/p>\n
Networking is a two-way street, so you shouldn\u2019t be purely focused on what you can get out of a connection. So, to badly mangle one of the most powerful quotes of all time, \u201cAsk not what your colleague can do for you, but what you can do for your colleague.\u201d Sometimes, just listening and being an active, thoughtful participant in a conversation is enough.<\/p>\n
Within a day of the event, send a note saying something to the effect of: \u201cIt was nice to meet you! Let\u2019s stay in touch, and if I hear of any opportunities you\u2019d be interested in, I\u2019ll let you know.\u201d Send your note to an email account rather than a social media profile, as you\u2019d be surprised by many people don\u2019t check their LinkedIn accounts that often.<\/p>\n
And finally, when you do go to a networking event, you don\u2019t have to adopt an extroverted persona, but you should present the best version of yourself. You can still be an introvert, but be a sincere, honest, engaged one who is comfortable in your own skin. People will respond! The more at-ease and relaxed you appear, the more likely it is that people will approach you.<\/p>\n